Bondage expectation vs reality and my evolution of bondage interests
Posted: Tue May 09, 2023 11:46 pm
A recent bondage experience has got me thinking about the differences between a bondage scenario in my head and how it plays out in reality.
So I met a woman online through a vanilla dating app and we hit it off. Suddenly we got talking about our kinks and fantasies and it turned out we both shared a love of bondage. She had a lot more experience with me. Being bi, she had dominated several men and women but never got her turn as a sub which she told me she craved. As a switch I told her I would be happy to oblige if she returned the favour.
So we met up several times before for normal dates, and things went well.
After a while I invited her to stay at mines for the weekend and we decided to play on one of the nights. The week long build up to her stay I spent fantasising about what we would do. Don't get me wrong, I know I'm not some super flexible model. My expectations were simple. Maybe she'd chair tie me and leave me squirming whilst she occasionally teased me?
To avoid turning this into a story, I'll skim over the details. I tied her up first, cuffing her hands behind her back and tying her ankles crossed over. She was ball gagged, nipple clamped and blindfolded. I left her kneeling in the middle of the room whilst I spanked and teased her for an hour with a wand.
Next was my turn. My hands were tied behind my back with her tights. Her pants were stuffed into my mouth and secured with more tights. Then I was blindfolded with another pair of tights. I was led to a chair and sat on it in the centre of the room. Then my ankles were tied with yep, you guessed it, more tights (She specifically brought several pairs for this purpose). Finally, she added nipple clamps.
She then proceeded to write her name on me with marker pen, and kiss all over my body with thick red lipstick leaving several lip marks on me. You could see she was definitely more experienced as a domme than I was.
She did everything I had hoped for, and much much more. Yet as I sat there, I actually found myself kinda bored. I just wanted to be untied so I could tie her up again. I actually felt quite silly sat there, and almost like a spoilt child. Here I was getting exactly what I wanted and yet I wasn't that bothered about it.
I didn't last the whole hour. I eventually asked to be untied and we did other stuff instead.
But it got me wondering. It felt very anti climactic. Like when you seen a TV advert for a toy as a child and it was all super hyped and excited then you got the toy and felt like "ah cool. Guess I own this now.".
I might have ruined my perception of bondage by writing all these wild and extreme stories on here, by watching hours of professional bondage models and riggers doing their thing.
I've never been one for extreme bondage, a chair tie and a gag excited me. Yet there I was, and nothing.
I think years of viewing bondage material online and wishing to swap places with the sub has actually built up my desire to be the dominant more than I was aware.
I think that when it comes to subbing, fantasy trumps reality for me.
Or maybe my interest in bondage as a whole has started to decline...
Anyway, I was just wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences to mines? Or has noticed a significant change in their bondage interests over time?
So I met a woman online through a vanilla dating app and we hit it off. Suddenly we got talking about our kinks and fantasies and it turned out we both shared a love of bondage. She had a lot more experience with me. Being bi, she had dominated several men and women but never got her turn as a sub which she told me she craved. As a switch I told her I would be happy to oblige if she returned the favour.
So we met up several times before for normal dates, and things went well.
After a while I invited her to stay at mines for the weekend and we decided to play on one of the nights. The week long build up to her stay I spent fantasising about what we would do. Don't get me wrong, I know I'm not some super flexible model. My expectations were simple. Maybe she'd chair tie me and leave me squirming whilst she occasionally teased me?
To avoid turning this into a story, I'll skim over the details. I tied her up first, cuffing her hands behind her back and tying her ankles crossed over. She was ball gagged, nipple clamped and blindfolded. I left her kneeling in the middle of the room whilst I spanked and teased her for an hour with a wand.
Next was my turn. My hands were tied behind my back with her tights. Her pants were stuffed into my mouth and secured with more tights. Then I was blindfolded with another pair of tights. I was led to a chair and sat on it in the centre of the room. Then my ankles were tied with yep, you guessed it, more tights (She specifically brought several pairs for this purpose). Finally, she added nipple clamps.
She then proceeded to write her name on me with marker pen, and kiss all over my body with thick red lipstick leaving several lip marks on me. You could see she was definitely more experienced as a domme than I was.
She did everything I had hoped for, and much much more. Yet as I sat there, I actually found myself kinda bored. I just wanted to be untied so I could tie her up again. I actually felt quite silly sat there, and almost like a spoilt child. Here I was getting exactly what I wanted and yet I wasn't that bothered about it.
I didn't last the whole hour. I eventually asked to be untied and we did other stuff instead.
But it got me wondering. It felt very anti climactic. Like when you seen a TV advert for a toy as a child and it was all super hyped and excited then you got the toy and felt like "ah cool. Guess I own this now.".
I might have ruined my perception of bondage by writing all these wild and extreme stories on here, by watching hours of professional bondage models and riggers doing their thing.
I've never been one for extreme bondage, a chair tie and a gag excited me. Yet there I was, and nothing.
I think years of viewing bondage material online and wishing to swap places with the sub has actually built up my desire to be the dominant more than I was aware.
I think that when it comes to subbing, fantasy trumps reality for me.
Or maybe my interest in bondage as a whole has started to decline...
Anyway, I was just wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences to mines? Or has noticed a significant change in their bondage interests over time?