Help asking my GF to tie me up

[gaggedinbriefs]

Hi all,

Hope 2023 is being kind to you. I have decided that this 2023 I want more TUGs in my life! You all seem a very supportive bunch and I would really appreciate your assistance.

My girlfriend and I used to be quite into TUGs in a bedroom capacity. She used to enjoy me tying her up an awful lot and we used to have so much fun doing it. However, she has been having some personal issues so she isn't very into s*x right now which we're both working out. But that aside, I really miss the feel of being tied up. I don't even want it to lead to anything like... that. We've turned a little long distance recently which doesn't help. I am seeing her all of this week so want to make it count!

I've mentioned a few months ago to her how I would love if when she went to shower or was doing stuff in another room if she could leave me tied up a bit and gagged but she automatically went to 'this means he wants sex afterwards' and I think that freaked her out.

I want to approach this earnestly and considerately but wanted to know if any of you have experience of this sort of thing and might have any advice you could give me for how I could ask her to tie me up but for us both to be comfortable?

Thank you in advance!

[leconteur]

I would just be explicit like you're being here; "this isn't a primer for sex, its a way for us to share some physical intimacy, to do something together as a team." There are periods people go through in their lives where libido takes a backseat, or where it isn't even present. The idea that because of that people cannot be intimate at all is wrong. Its a false dichotomy that all physical contact is sexual in nature.

[tiedinbluetights]

I would just be explicit like you're being here; "this isn't a primer for sex, its a way for us to share some physical intimacy, to do something together as a team." There are periods people go through in their lives where libido takes a backseat, or where it isn't even present. The idea that because of that people cannot be intimate at all is wrong. Its a false dichotomy that all physical contact is sexual in nature.

I cannot think of any better advice than this!

[banshee]

I don't want to be a downer but keep in mind she might not be into tying you up for the sake of it, it may be fun for you but to her it may mean taking time to tie you up and then just hang around, not being able to do much with you since you're tied up.

[DallasNotAustin]

I mean aside from the obvious "be completely honest about your feelings" I don't really see another way to convince her. Bear in mind that everyone sees bondage and TUGs differently and while you might not see it as an inherently sexual act, she might see it as only sexual. I'm kinda the same way with my partner. If you want my advice, be completely honest and do not attempt to manipulate the situation or wording at all. If she still doesnt agree to it, drop it. If she really wanted to then she would tell you.

Sorry if I came across as blunt, but I really think that honesty is the only way that you can progress in this situation. Hope it helps!

[Mister The Edge]

I would just be explicit like you're being here; "this isn't a primer for sex, its a way for us to share some physical intimacy, to do something together as a team." There are periods people go through in their lives where libido takes a backseat, or where it isn't even present. The idea that because of that people cannot be intimate at all is wrong. Its a false dichotomy that all physical contact is sexual in nature.

Great advice!

If she's interested, OP, try some tied up cuddles.

[sami200456boyfriend]

Just ask nicely.

[leconteur]

Great advice!

If she's interested, OP, try some tied up cuddles.

The pair bonding in humans relies heavily on cuddles and hugs and snuggles. Its a biological foundation for our ability to form strong companionship.