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Any negative Pro-Domme experiences?

Posted: Tue Dec 07, 2021 5:03 am
by The WinterShuffle
Hey everyone, this is just something I’m curious about, and I figured I’d ask the forum.

I went to see a Pro-Dominatrix for the first time, and the session did not really go how I thought it would. It was a face sitting/smothering session, and I’d made a request to be wrapped in plastic wrap like a mummy for the session. When I arrived, she seemed surprised, and said she’d pencilled me in for two hours later than when I had showed up, even tho we’d been talking about the session plan for weeks, and I’d confirmed it with her several times.

And the session itself seemed to start abruptly and without much idk “warming up” I guess for lack of a better word. Also me being mummified was neglected entirely, which was a let down, but since this was my first time I didn’t feel confident enough to speak up.

Idk, overall it honestly put me off wanting to see a professional dominatrix again, and for a couple weeks it honestly put me off bondage, like I was questioning if this lifestyle was actually for me. So I’m curious, has anyone else had an experience with a Pro-Domme that left you feeling dissapointed afterwards?

Re: Any negative Pro-Domme experiences?

Posted: Tue Dec 07, 2021 11:22 am
by bondagefreak
[mention]The WinterShuffle[/mention]
It's really good that you've decided to open up about this, as keeping your mediocre experiences bottled in is never a good idea.

I honestly have no idea what sort of reception you'll get (if any), but I want to assure you that lousy/poor experiences are part of the game. Not only for you subs, but also for us Doms. Your reaction is perfectly normal. I believe most of us have felt the exact same way after experiencing disappointment.

You know what they say right?
Whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

You will be more cautious next time and you'll be far better prepared to face future bondage-related disappointments when you come across them. It's part of the learning experience. And while these undesirable experiences suck, they actually do make you stronger in the sense that you won't experience as much of a cool down next time you're confronted with disappointment.

After a few years of meeting up, you'll be able to brush off those mediocre encounters as though they were nothing.
All in all, it's part of the game. You'll get some good ones and some not so good ones.

The reason why you'll keep coming back is that good encounter yields far outway any disappointment resulting from shitty encounters. In other words, even though you'll come across a few sour apples, it's still entirely worth it.

Re: Any negative Pro-Domme experiences?

Posted: Tue Dec 07, 2021 2:00 pm
by MrBind
Sort of a negative experience (or experiences).

When between girlfriends, I looked into going to a pro-Domme. All I was wanting was to be bound and gagged, either nude or in underwear, by the Domme while she wore a leotard and tights. While I struggled, she would talk to be about being tied up (if she ever had).

The Dommes I talked to (or at least, the women who answered the phones all said that could be done. But, in addition to the fee (they were all pretty damn steep for what I wanted) I was encouraged to give the Domme a "tribute". Huh? I wasn't going to worship her, and she's not a Queen.

Plus, I was to address the Domme (again, I checked two, maybe three places) as either "Mistress" or "Ma'am". Again, Huh? She would be providing a service, like a doctor or lawyer. I was the customer, not her.

I ended up taking a hard pass on the whole thing.

Re: Any negative Pro-Domme experiences?

Posted: Tue Dec 07, 2021 5:43 pm
by Flyingvulture
MrBind wrote: 2 years ago Sort of a negative experience (or experiences).

When between girlfriends, I looked into going to a pro-Domme. All I was wanting was to be bound and gagged, either nude or in underwear, by the Domme while she wore a leotard and tights. While I struggled, she would talk to be about being tied up (if she ever had).

The Dommes I talked to (or at least, the women who answered the phones all said that could be done. But, in addition to the fee (they were all pretty damn steep for what I wanted) I was encouraged to give the Domme a "tribute". Huh? I wasn't going to worship her, and she's not a Queen.

Plus, I was to address the Domme (again, I checked two, maybe three places) as either "Mistress" or "Ma'am". Again, Huh? She would be providing a service, like a doctor or lawyer. I was the customer, not her.

I ended up taking a hard pass on the whole thing.
This is a phenomenon I keep seeing over and over:

People just want to get B&G but the "pro's" only offer what they want to do and they get to break your hard limits.

Why is it so hard to find someone to do just the B&G part?

Re: Any negative Pro-Domme experiences?

Posted: Tue Dec 07, 2021 5:45 pm
by The WinterShuffle
[mention]bondagefreak[/mention] that is actually a very good way of looking at it thank you. This pro-Domme experience actually happened earlier in the same month I was mummified for the first time, so I definitely bounced back alright :lol:

You’re absolutely right that the good of that mummification outweighed the bad of the dominatrix session. It’s still something I’d like to try while I’m currently single, but I will definitely be more cautious in my selection process.

I will say, she actually ticked an important box for me in that she regularly communicated with me in the lead up, which was nice but also ultimately fueled the disappointment I felt when she seemed so unprepared. That being said, a lot of dommes I’ve talked to seem to confirm the session and then not want to discuss any outline or even give an address until the day prior, which I’ve decided is a bit of a no-no for me lol

Re: Any negative Pro-Domme experiences?

Posted: Wed Dec 08, 2021 12:43 pm
by David Han
Pro Domme just added conditions and rules. It made since to be at first. To be clean shaven, clean fingernails and toenails, hair cut, arrive on time, address her as Mistress + her name, will show up wearing certain clothes, etc... but then fast forward to meet. She just blocked me. Said I would not respond to her email. Except that I did and red flag there.

Re: Any negative Pro-Domme experiences?

Posted: Wed Dec 08, 2021 2:03 pm
by MrBind
Totally not cool of her. :x